1337：Witnessing the Guru’s Compassion (maitrī and karuṇā) Amidst Suffering from Illness

Prostrations to His Eminence Vajra Guru Rinchen Dorjee Rinpoche, His Holiness the Drikung Kyabgon Chetsang, the Lineage gurus, Dharma Protector Achi, and the Buddhas and Bodhisattvas. I am Yang Jia Xiong from Group Seven, and my Dharma name is Gong Chu Ding Xiang. My mother is Wu Rui Jie from Group Five. My wife is Yang Xin Hua, my son is Yang Wen Wei, and my daughter is Yang Fen Lian, all from Group One. I am grateful to Rinpoche for bestowing me the opportunity to praise the guru.

First, I will share how His Eminence Vajra Guru Rinchen Dorjee Rinpoche has helped my grandmother. During her lifetime, my grandmother had long suffered from heart disease. In early 2007, my uncle, who lived in Taichung, suddenly called my mother and informed her that my grandmother, who was nearly 90 years old at the time, had fainted due to a myocardial infarction and had been urgently sent to the intensive care unit. The doctor stated that my grandmother’s condition that night was extremely critical and that her condition was not optimistic, and asked the family members to be mentally prepared. My mother and I, this disciple, hurried to the Glorious Jewel to seek an audience with His Eminence Vajra Guru Rinchen Dorjee Rinpoche. Rinpoche compassionately (maitrī and karuṇā) expounded: ‘One o’clock that night is your grandmother’s critical moment. If she can get through it, she will recover; if she cannot, I will perform the Chod Dhrama for her.’ No further call was received from my uncle that day, and my grandmother safely passed through the critical moment that night.

Although my grandmother was temporarily out of danger, most of her heart muscle had become necrotic due to the myocardial infarction. My uncle traveled north and, together with my mother and me, again sought an audience with Rinpoche, imploring Rinpoche to help my grandmother alleviate her suffering. Rinpoche expounded: ‘If your grandmother still has remaining lifespan, she will recover after I chant mantras; if her lifespan has already come to an end, once I chant mantras, she will immediately pass away. Ask your uncle whether he agrees with chanting mantras.’ My uncle said: ‘Yes, I agree.’ After Rinpoche asked for my grandmother’s name and zodiac sign, Rinpoche immediately entered ding (Puja Teachings Index 06) to chant mantras, blessing my grandmother. Rinpoche also blessed a nectar pill and instructed my uncle to quickly bring it back to the hospital for my grandmother to take.

The next day, as soon as we arrived at the hospital, my uncle placed the nectar pill into my grandmother’s mouth. At that time, my grandmother was extremely weak, with her hands covered with needles and tubes, yet she still struggled to raise both hands and reverently put her palms together and nodded toward the Dharma portrait of His Eminence Vajra Guru Rinchen Dorjee Rinpoche. Despite being seriously ill, my grandmother still knew to express gratitude and reverence to Rinpoche.

After that, my grandmother’s condition gradually stabilized. The tubes that had originally been inserted throughout her body were removed one by one. Shortly after, she was transferred from the intensive care unit to a regular ward and was soon discharged from the hospital to return home. After my grandmother was discharged, she participated in the Great Amitabha Puja of Transferring Consciousness at the same year, and also went to the Glorious Jewel to express gratitude to Rinpoche for the life-saving benevolence. During the audience, Rinpoche looked at my grandmother very gently and benignly, and she immediately rose from her wheelchair, knelt, and paid homage to Rinpoche. Rinpoche then immediately chanted mantras to bless my grandmother and bestowed another nectar pill for my grandmother to take. Later, my grandmother passed away in 2014 and also received the compassionate (maitrī and karuṇā) approval of Rinchen Dorjee Rinpoche to transfer her consciousness during the Chod Puja. I am grateful to Rinpoche!

Next, I would like to share how the guru has helped me. I am an engineer working in the technology industry, specializing in computer software. For over twenty years, I have used my brain for long hours, often having to stare at a computer screen. I also frequently work overtime and stay up late, resulting in a very irregular lifestyle and poor eyesight. During my university years, I once suffered from retinal detachment due to severe myopia. It was not until October 2006 that, because I was extremely busy with work at that time, I often spent long hours staring at computer screens, forgetting to take breaks. One day, I suddenly felt soreness and discomfort in my eyes, and the colors I saw also seemed somewhat different from usual. Thus, I went to an ophthalmology clinic for an examination. After using a funduscope to examine my eyes, the doctor at the clinic discovered that I had bleeding in the fundus of the retina. The doctor stated that there was no immediate treatment that could be performed for this condition and that I could only wait for the bleeding to stop on its own and gradually be absorbed. Even after the bleeding stopped, there was no guarantee that my vision would not deteriorate or be affected.

At that time, I thought in my mind that this was the retribution of the evil karma I had created. Regardless of what the final outcome would be, I should accept it. After returning home, I paid homage to the Dharma portrait of His Eminence Vajra Guru Rinchen Dorjee Rinpoche on the mandala, repented, and took a nectar pill previously bestowed by Rinpoche during the pujas.

The next day, I went to a major hospital to undergo a fundus photography examination. One week later, the report of the fundus photograph from the hospital showed that the bleeding previously occurring in my fundus had unexpectedly completely disappeared, with no sequelae left behind, and my vision was not affected because of it.

The doctor had clearly seen the bleeding in my fundus just the day before. According to normal circumstances, it was impossible for the bleeding to completely disappear without a trace the next day. This was entirely the result of Rinpoche’s compassionate (maitrī and karuṇā) blessings and rescue. Later, I also encountered two or three colleagues who, like me, had severe myopia. They had all experienced similar symptoms of fundus retinal fluid accumulation or bleeding, and their central vision was affected to some degree afterward, some even suffering vision impairment. Retrospecting on my own experience at that time, I felt even more deeply the compassion (maitrī and karuṇā) and blessings of the guru. I am grateful to His Eminence Vajra Guru Rinchen Dorjee Rinpoche!

In 2007, I was fortunate to participate in the group welcoming Rinpoche for the completion of his retreat at Mount Lachi Snow Mountain in Nepal. At that time, Rinpoche assigned other Dharma brothers and me to handle some computer-related matters, which required us to locally find a machine capable of performing transcription. During that era, smartphones and the internet were not yet widespread, so we could not search for information online at any time on a mobile phone as we can today. Inquiring with the hotel also yielded no information, and we could only go out onto the streets to look for related shops and try our luck.

In the unfamiliar place of Kathmandu, Nepal, I completely had no idea where to look for the relevant equipment. Following another Dharma brother, I went to the city area. Less than one minute after getting off the vehicle, I suddenly saw an inconspicuous small English sign hanging on the second floor of a small alley, and that place happened to provide computer file transcription services.

At that moment, the only thought in my mind was admiration; it was truly extremely miraculous. Just as Rinpoche previously expounded during the pujas, the 125-year-old elderly nun from Qinghai in the lineage had bestowed assurance that Rinpoche’s Buddha Dharma activities would be perfectly accomplished, and that whatever Rinpoche wished would be accomplished and whatever he implored would be fulfilled. His Eminence Vajra Guru Rinchen Dorjee Rinpoche manifested the great capability to benefit sentient beings. Through personal experiences, this disciple’s faith in the guru and in the Buddha Dharma was reinforced.

In April 2023, my body again developed a serious condition. At that time, I had a persistent fever, and the fatigue I experienced during the day was exceptionally severe; often by the afternoon, even after drinking several cups of coffee, I was still dazed, and my complexion turned yellow and dark. When my colleagues saw my face, they all said that I looked as if something was not quite right. In addition, I developed symptoms of continual headaches that would not stop. 

After going to the hospital for an examination, I was found to have abnormal liver function indicators. As my physical condition continued to deteriorate, the doctor arranged a magnetic resonance imaging (MRI) examination, which revealed a shadow in my brain. The doctor stated that the preliminary assessment indicated that my condition was not optimistic and that I should be mentally prepared. Further CT scans and other examinations would be needed. Only when impermanence arrived did I realize that my habitual tendencies of self-righteousness and arrogance had never changed. When the matter actually happened to me, I was filled with uneasiness and anxiety in my inner heart, and I was completely unable to calm my mind to chant mantras or think of the Buddha properly. 

I spent the night in the emergency room like this. The next day, after I was admitted to the hospital, the results of further examinations showed that there was a two-centimeter arteriovenous malformation (AVM) in my brain, which is a congenital vascular disease. Normally, Human blood flows from arteries through capillaries and then to veins. However, in an arteriovenous malformation, the intervening capillaries are absent, causing blood to flow directly from the high-pressure arteries into the veins, which may lead to symptoms such as sudden cerebral hemorrhage, seizures, or headache. Besides, my liver function indicators continued to rise during my hospitalization, peaking at six to seven hundred. 

I am grateful to the guru for his compassionate (maitrī and karuṇā) blessings and protection. Although the hospital conducted various examinations, no definite cause of the illness could be identified. At that time, apart from feeling fatigued and weak, I did not develop any more serious symptoms. The persistent headaches and abnormal liver function indicators gradually improved. Under Rinpoche’s blessings, my liver function GPT and GOT index levels decreased from 600 to a little over 100 within one week, and I was smoothly discharged from the hospital two weeks later. 

Rinpoche once expounded during the pujas that, ‘People who consume more spirit, those who engage in prolonged excessive mental exertion, and those who stay up late without sleeping, will deplete their kidney qi (energy). This also includes the group of overworked people.’ I am exactly that kind of disobedient and evil disciple, who has chronically overused my mind, frequently stayed up late, and had an irregular daily routine. Rinpoche had compassionately (maitrī and karuṇā) reminded the disciples long ago, yet I still did not truly believe it nor did I act according to the teachings. Only when my body developed serious problems, and I had to be hospitalized and suffer, did I realize how seriously I had been wrong. 

After being discharged from the hospital in May 2023, I sought an audience with Rinpoche on the weekend. Rinpoche reprimanded me on the spot: ‘You simply do not believe what I have said. Now the one who is suffering from illness is you, not me.’ Rinpoche then instructed me to step aside and perform the grand prostrations immediately. The following week, I again sought an audience with Rinpoche, and Rinpoche compassionately (maitrī and karuṇā) granted me the opportunity to perform the grand prostrations at the Buddhist Center. I am grateful to Rinpoche!

I would also like to take this opportunity to openly repent for the evil karma I have committed from accumulated past lifetimes. I repent for not being close to the guru at normal times, caring only about myself, and for being selfish and self-interested. Although I have taken refuge for many years, my mindset has remained the same as that of believers who seek protection. I thought of the guru only when I encountered difficulties, yet ordinarily, I didn’t truly practice according to the teachings. I placed mundane affairs above supramundane, always putting work, family, my own enjoyment, and various worldly trivial affairs in priority, and didn’t regard learning Buddhism and being liberated from birth and death as the most important thing. 

I repent for my own personality of being scattered, slacking off, and lazy. As is written in the Thirty-Seven Practices of the Bodhisattvas: ‘striving as if putting out a fire on one’s head,’ yet I have always taken things slowly, procrastinated, and entirely lacked diligence. I did not donate to the Glorious Jewel Buddhist Monastery of Rinchen Dorjee Rinpoche at the first moment, nor did I have the mind to make offerings, constantly placing great importance on money. 

I repent for intentionally or unintentionally harming, abusing, and killing many sentient beings from accumulated past lifetimes. When I was young, I dissected frogs and killed many earthworms and various insects. From childhood to adulthood, I was greedy for my food cravings and ate the meat of countless sentient beings. Here, I repent to the sentient beings that I have harmed. I repent for sinning by stealing. During working hours, I failed to distinguish between public and private matters, misused company property for my own purposes, and used various pirated software, counterfeit products, and pirated books. 

Lastly, I pray for His Eminence Vajra Guru Rinchen Dorjee Rinpoche’s good health; his Dharma wheel turns unceasingly; his Buddha Dharma activities flourish; Rinchen Dorjee Rinpoche’s Dharma lineage spreads eternally; the Glorious Jewel Buddhist Monastery of Rinchen Dorjee Rinpoche benefits vast sentient beings. I am grateful to His Eminence Vajra Guru Rinchen Dorjee Rinpoche! I thank all fellow believers and Dharma brothers for listening patiently. 

Reverently written by disciple Yang Jia Xiong, Group Seven, 

 on July 26, 2026

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Updated on July 29, 2026