1333：Appreciation to the Guru’s Compassionate (Maitrī and Karuṇā) Teachings, Allowing the Disciple to Realize the Preciousness of Taking Refuge

Prostrations to His Eminence Vajra Guru Rinchen Dorjee Rinpoche, His Holiness the Drikung Kyabgon Chetsang, the Lineage gurus, Dharma Protector Achi, and the Buddhas and Bodhisattvas. Greetings, fellow believers and Dharma brothers. I am Guo Ting Wei from Group Three, my Dharma name is Gong Chu Ding Wen, and I took refuge in His Eminence Vajra Guru Rinchen Dorjee Rinpoche on February 15, 2026. My father is Guo Zheng Rong from Group Three, my mother is Xu Shu Juan from Group One, my aunt and my sister separately are Xu Yi Han and Li Yong Ci, both from Group One, and my uncle is Li Kun Jin from Group Three. I am the disciple who implored 14 times before being granted to attend the pujas, and who implored 23 times before being granted to take refuge. I am grateful to the guru for compassionately (maitrī and karuṇā) granting me the opportunity to publicly praise the guru’s merits, share with you the fate through which I came into contact with the Glorious Jewel as well as how I was granted to take refuge after imploration, and to repent for the evil karma I have committed.
 
The first time I came into contact with the Glorious Jewel and His Eminence Vajra Guru Rinchen Dorjee Rinpoche can be traced back to 2006, when I was in the second grade of primary school. I still clearly remember that on a weekday late at night, I suddenly developed a high fever that did not subside. My parents kept trying to help me reduce the fever at home, but there was always no significant effect, ultimately, they had to urgently send me to a hospital in Tainan. I originally thought it was only a temporary illness, but, unexpectedly, after the doctor’s diagnosis, because they could not find a definite cause for the illness, they arranged for me to be hospitalized for observation. It turned out that I stayed there for five days.
 
During those five days, my high fever repeatedly flared up, and my condition had never been stable. Every day in the hospital, the doctors continuously drew my blood, gave me intravenous drips, and arranged various examinations and tests, hoping to find the true cause of the illness. However, after two to three days, my illness still did not improve. Just then, my aunt’s friend, Dharma brother Zeng from Group Eight, learned about my situation and specially came to the hospital to visit me. At that time, she shared with us the trace of how Rinpoche had compassionately (maitrī and karuṇā) saved her son, and asked us whether we would seek an audience with Rinpoche.
 
Later, my father personally said that at that time he was thinking in his mind that I had already been hospitalized for several days, but the doctors had never been able to diagnose the true cause of my illness, and could only continuously draw blood and give intravenous drips every day. Seeing me repeatedly have high fever, and appear weak and distressed, he and my mother felt deeply pained and could not bear to see me suffer, but they did not know how else they could help me. At a loss, my parents decided to take me to seek an audience with Rinpoche.
 
On the fifth day of hospitalization, we made a request for discharge to the hospital. At that time, the doctors even particularly required us to sign a Against Medical Advice Discharge Form, indicating that if there were any subsequent condition or outcome about my illness, we would need to take the responsibility by ourselves. Then, on the day of discharge, we immediately drove from Tainan all the way north to the Glorious Jewel to seek an audience with His Eminence Vajra Guru Rinchen Dorjee Rinpoche.
 
Because I was suffering from a persistent high fever and very weak in physical condition at that time, some of the details were later told to me by my parents. However, I still clearly remember the process of seeking an audience with Rinpoche at that time. When it was our turn to seek an audience, Rinpoche compassionately (maitrī and karuṇā) asked, ‘What is it?’ My mother then explained to Rinpoche my hospitalization due to a high fever and mentioned that I had already stayed in the hospital for five days, but the doctors had still been unable to find the true cause of the illness after examinations. Rinpoche asked my mother, ‘What did the doctors say? Did they mention what illness it might be?’ My mother suddenly forgot and mumbled her words, unable to say clearly. Unexpectedly, Rinpoche directly said, ‘Gastroenteritis!’
 
I was extremely astonished at that moment, because this matter had only been privately mentioned to my parents by the doctor, yet Rinpoche amazingly knew it clearly. Then Rinpoche turned to see my father and asked, ‘What did you give him for lunch?’ My father replied, ‘Chicken leg rice.’ Rinpoche immediately reprimanded my father, saying, ‘He has already been ill, and you still bought non-vegetarian food for him to eat!’ Looking back now, I just realize how irreverent we were at that time; even before going to seek an audience with Rinpoche, we were still eating non-vegetarian food.
 
Following that, Rinpoche also said to my parents, ‘Someone in your family has given him money, and he bought snacks at the school store. Do not eat snacks from the school store anymore.’ Only later did I learn that a large portion of the ingredients in those snacks contained seafood. Since my parents did not usually give me pocket money, they had never thought that I would have money to buy snacks. Yet Rinpoche knew it clearly. After returning home, my parents asked relatives whether anyone had secretly given me pocket money. Upon hearing this, the relatives were also shocked because they knew that I would never proactively speak about this matter.

Afterward, Rinpoche compassionately (maitrī and karuṇā) instructed my parents to go to a Chinese medicine pharmacy, ask a Chinese medicine doctor to prescribe the specified medicinal ingredients, bring them back, and boil them for me to drink; I would be fine. At that time, my father was actually half-believing and half-doubtful, thinking in his mind: ‘He has been in the hospital for five days, and whatever examinations were conducted, the doctors still could not find the true cause of the illness. How could he get well just by taking Chinese medicine?’ However, because there was no other method at the time, they still followed Rinpoche’s instructions and asked the Chinese medicine doctor to prescribe the medicinal ingredients regarding the cause of the illness instructed by Rinpoche. Originally, the Chinese medicine doctor prescribed a five-day course of medicine. Unexpectedly, after I finished taking the first day’s medicine, my high fever subsided. My family members all felt that it was extremely incredible.
 
Thus, the following week, my parents again took me north to seek an audience with Rinpoche. I am grateful to Rinpoche. At that audience, my mother also reported to Rinpoche that since the first year of primary school, my intraocular pressure had always been on the high side through vision examinations. A clinic doctor suggested to us that I should go to a larger hospital for further examination. The doctor at the larger hospital assessed that my intraocular pressure was too high and, combined with congenital abnormalities of my eyeballs, suspected that I might have glaucoma. Therefore, from the first year of primary school until my first year of university, my parents took me to the hospital for regular follow-up examinations.
 
At that time, Rinpoche looked at us and expounded only one sentence: ‘Be vegetarian.’ After hearing this, my mother had a thought in her mind: ‘Would being a vegetarian cause a lack of nutrition for a child?’ Unexpectedly, just as this thought arose, Rinpoche suddenly turned to look at my mother and said, ‘Do not worry that one will lack nutrition when being a vegetarian.’ Reflecting on it now, I realize that Rinpoche not only clearly knew the condition of my body, but also perfectly knew the fleeting thought that arose in my mother’s mind. At that audience, my mother also implored Rinpoche to allow us to attend the general Sunday pujas. I am grateful to Rinpoche for compassionately (maitrī and karuṇā) granting it. Thus, our whole family began attending the pujas, until later we received the instruction that those who had not taken refuge could not attend the pujas.

At that time, our faith was insufficient, and we did not deeply believe in karma, nor did we truly cherish the fate compassionately (maitrī and karuṇā) granted by Rinpoche of attending the general Sunday pujas. We attended the general pujas for only one year, and we kept a vegetarian diet for only one year. Looking back now, we followed a vegetarian diet at that time, not because we had truly developed the mind of repentance and empathy toward eating meat and killing sentient beings in the past; rather, it was like we were forced to do. As time passed, we failed to learn from that illness and keep Rinpoche’s compassionate teachings in mind; instead, we were once again driven by our own craving for food, beginning to persuade ourselves with various excuses, such as: ‘Eating meat should not be a problem,’ ‘A vegetarian diet is not nutritious for children,’ and so on. In the end, we returned to our previous living habit of eating non-vegetarian food. I repent that we did not truly keep Rinpoche’s teachings in our minds at that time, and also repent for having no compassion toward sentient beings.
 
Later, the thought of seeking an audience with Rinpoche arose again when I was in my final year of high school preparing for the university entrance examination. During my three years of high school, I lived very desultorily, hardly put my mind to my studies, and mostly just played for fun at school. It was only when there were about two months left before the university entrance examination that I began to feel nervous and afraid. At that time, knowing that I had wasted too much time, I felt extremely uneasy and was afraid that I would not perform well in the exam. Thus, my thought of seeking an audience with His Eminence Vajra Guru Rinchen Dorjee Rinpoche arose once again.
 
Now in retrospect, my mindset at that time was in fact extremely irreverent. When I was a child and fell ill, I had already received Rinpoche’s compassionately (maitrī and karuṇā) life-saving help. However, afterward I did not truly cherish that fate, nor did I continue to be vegetarian or learn Buddhism. Only when I was about to take the university entrance examination and became fearful, did I once again want to seek an audience with Rinpoche, hoping to obtain a source of support from the guru that would ease my mind. I repent that at that time I came with the mindset of merely seeking protection and wishing for a smooth examination, and I did not truly contemplate the benevolence of the guru, nor did I truly want to correct myself.
 
When I sought an audience, Rinpoche compassionately (maitrī and karuṇā) asked, ‘What is it?’ I then reported to Rinpoche that I was about to take the university entrance examination, but there had been a persistent feeling of unease and failing to calm down in my mind. Of course, Rinpoche knew what my real problem was, and directly expounded: ‘Haven’t you ever heard the saying, “If you don’t work hard normally, you’ll end up cramming at the last minute”?’ This saying completely described my situation at that time.
 
Then Rinpoche further expounded that if he were to bless me to let me perform very well in the exam, would that not be unfair to those who had studied diligently in ordinary times? After hearing this, I also understood that I indeed had no qualification to implore for achieving a very high score. I am grateful to Rinpoche for still compassionately (maitrī and karuṇā) blessing me, and for expounding that I would not fail the exam, but that I should also not expect to reach the top level; Rinpoche would let me be admitted to a school that was suitable for me.
 
At that time, I did not actually understand what ‘a suitable school for me’ meant. It was not until I entered the workforce and started to work that I gradually realized the compassion (maitrī and karuṇā) behind this expounding from Rinpoche. Because at the department I attended at university, the professors were very strict to students, and it could even be said to be extremely challenging. At that time, I often felt a great deal of pressure. However, precisely because I have been chastened in this way during my university years, when I later entered the workplace and faced many tasks that others considered highly stressful, I was instead able to bear them and was less inclined to complain. Only when I retrospect now do I understand that what Rinpoche meant by  ‘suitable’ at that time was not that I would go to a place, which was easy and comfortable, but rather an environment that could hone me and help me face life and work in the future. I am grateful for Rinpoche’s compassionate (maitrī and karuṇā) blessings and arrangement.
 
However, this audience with Rinpoche before the university entrance examination did not lead me to truly make up my mind to be a vegetarian and learn Buddhism. After the university entrance examination, I returned to a state of indulgence, continuing to be greedy for pleasure and eat non-vegetarian food. When my parents implored for attending the Chod Puja and were granted in 2020, and later also were granted to take refuge after imploration, I nevertheless did not go together with them. I still placed entertainment first, thinking that I was still a student and that life among friends was for play and fun. I did not think learning Buddhism was an important thing. I repent for my ignorance, being influenced by external circumstances and peer mindsets and not keeping the guru and the Buddha Dharma in my heart.
 
It was not until I was approaching my second year of university that I was finally determined to begin to be a vegetarian. Yet, it was during my military service after graduation that I truly developed the thought of seeking an audience with Rinpoche and wanting to implore for taking refuge.

During my time in the military, I used my free time to repeatedly and reverently read Rinpoche’s book Happiness and Suffering several times. Also, because of some situations experienced by friends around me, I began to sense the impermanence of life. Over the past few years, my parents had also gradually shared with me their experience of learning Buddhism and the reason that learning Buddhism is extremely important. However, at that time I often could not take it in, and sometimes, I would even feel impatient after listening for a long time. It was not until I began to reverently read Happiness and Suffering that those resistant thoughts slowly diminished. The book felt like it carried a highly strong power, which led me to truly contemplate the impermanence of life, and to gradually realize that learning Buddhism is not something optional, but a great matter that concerns the reincarnation of birth and death.
 
One week before my discharge from military service, during a phone call with my parents in the evening, I said that on the weekend of my discharge, I wanted to seek an audience with Rinpoche, imploring for taking refuge. My parents were somewhat surprised upon hearing this, because ordinarily, believers would first implore for attending the pujas and then imploring for taking refuge. However, they did not directly point this out to me, but simply knew that since I had expressed my wish to implore for taking refuge, they would accompany me to seek an audience.
 
At that audience, when it was my turn to kneel before Rinpoche’s Dharma throne, I directly reported to Rinpoche that I wanted to beg for refuge. Rinpoche asked me, ‘Why do you want to take refuge?’ I replied, ‘To be liberated from birth and death.’ Rinpoche smiled, and then instructed a monastic Dharma brother to talk with me.
 
The monastic Dharma brother asked me whether I had read Rinpoche’s book Happiness and Suffering. I answered yes. The monastic Dharma brother then asked me how many times I had read it. I replied three times. The monastic Dharma brother then told me that I should go back and read it at least thirty times before coming again to seek an audience.
 
Thus, I read Rinpoche’s book Happiness and Suffering repeatedly after I returned. After that, I sought an audience several more times. Rinpoche sometimes replied, ‘Not yet granted’; sometimes, Rinpoche instructed a monastic Dharma brother to talk with me. Now recalling it, I realize that it was because I have not yet truly made sufficient determination, nor have I truly understood why learning Buddhism is important.
 
At that moment, my answer ‘to be liberated from birth and death’ was not truly realized from my own heart. It is because my mother had once shared with me her experience of imploring for taking refuge; at that time, Rinpoche also asked my mother why she wanted to implore for taking refuge, and my mother replied, ‘To be liberated from birth and death.’ Rinpoche later compassionately (maitrī and karuṇā) granted my mother to take refuge. Thus, at that time, I was merely repeating the answer my mother had once shared, but I did not truly understand why one should be liberated from birth and death, nor did I truly realize the suffering of reincarnation or the importance of learning Buddhism.

I am grateful to Rinpoche for clearly knowing that I had not truly attained understanding, and therefore not immediately granting my imploration. Instead, Rinpoche compassionately (maitrī and karuṇā) instructed me to repeatedly read Happiness and Suffering, and allowed me, through one audience as well as teaching after another, to gradually contemplate why I wanted to learn Buddhism, why I wanted to take refuge, and that taking refuge is not merely something spoken verbally, but something that should arise as a true determination from the heart.
 
Later, during my subsequent imploration for attending the pujas and for taking refuge, Rinpoche unceasingly taught me and blessed me through various means, and also directly pointed out my problems. During that period of imploring for taking refuge, Rinpoche once directly expounded to me: ‘From the first time you implored to now, your temper and personality have not been corrected at all.’ At that moment, I was a little stunned, because I had always considered myself to be a person with an excellent temper, and even thought that I did not normally get angry with others easily.
 
Yet, only when I returned and carefully reflected on myself did I realize that what Rinpoche had expounded was completely correct. In particular, when facing my parents, if they said something even slightly not to my liking, I would immediately talk back, object, and even respond with an impatient tone. As such, I did not have a good temper at all; I merely maintained superficial harmony in front of outsiders, while at home I reserved my worst temper for my parents, who were closest to me and took care of me the most.
 
I am grateful to Rinpoche for compassionately (maitrī and karuṇā) and directly pointing out my problems, allowing me to begin to see the habits I had long been unwilling to acknowledge before. Only after that did I slowly start to pay attention to the tone I spoke to my parents. When there were disagreements, I reminded myself not to immediately talk back, but to pause first and try to think from their perspective. Although I still have many aspects that need to be corrected, I am grateful for Rinpoche’s expounding, which made me understand that true practice is not about merely appearing to have a good temper; rather, it is about learning to treat everyone with the mind of reverence and gratitude; especially when it comes to one’s parents, who are closest and care for oneself the most, one should by no means reserve one’s worst temper for them.
 
I remember another time when I sought an audience with Rinpoche, and I had already entered the workforce to work at that time. Rinpoche asked me, ‘How much do you give your family each month?’ I replied, ‘Four thousand NT dollars.’ Rinpoche immediately rebuked me, saying, ‘Do you treat your mother like a beggar? You give her only four thousand NT dollars a month.’ Rinpoche then expounded to my mother, letting her recall how much money had been spent on me since childhood to adulthood. My mother later shared with me that she had originally forgotten many things during my childhood, but after Rinpoche pointed this out, she remembered everything. It is because in childhood, I was indeed a very costly child. My parents’ approach to my education was that, as long as something was good for me, they were willing to spend money for me to learn it. However, I did not cherish each learning opportunity nor did I seriously take the tutoring and courses my parents arranged for me.
 
I am grateful to Rinpoche for clearly knowing my past, also knowing how much effort my parents had spared for me, and for even knowing the mindset with which I was repaying them at present. At the next audience, Rinpoche again asked my mother, ‘Has he given you money recently?’ My mother replied yes. Only through these teachings did I begin to realize how my parents had cultivated and cared for me before. Although I had just entered the workforce and my ability was still limited, I should at least have expressed my gratitude and feedback through my actions, instead of solely putting myself first.
 
On the fourteenth time I implored for taking refuge and for attending the pujas, I am grateful to Rinpoche for compassionately (maitrī and karuṇā) granting me to be able to attend the weekly pujas; however, Rinpoche still did not grant me to take refuge. Looking back now, it was that Rinpoche compassionately gave me the opportunity, allowing me to, through attending each puja, gradually contemplate why I wanted to take refuge and what the importance of taking refuge was, and to see whether I truly had the determination to follow the guru in learning Buddhism.
 
Later, I continued to seek an audience for many times. It was not until August 2, 2025, on my twenty-third time seeking an audience, that Rinpoche eventually compassionately (maitrī and karuṇā) agreed to let me take refuge. When I heard Rinpoche say, ‘Alright! Let him register.’ I was kneeling before Rinpoche’s Dharma throne and could hardly hold back my tears. It was because, for me, this was extremely difficult to attain and exceedingly precious. I had implored a total of twenty-three times, which took me a little over two years, before I finally obtained the opportunity to take refuge.
 
I am grateful to Rinpoche for using this method to teach me, allowing me to understand that taking refuge is not just a sentence, nor a formality, nor something that would surely be granted by the wish of imploring. Taking refuge is an incomparably wondrous and hard-won fate in one’s life, and even is the wisdom-life of learning Buddhism that a disciple must cherish using the mind of reverence, determination, and action. Without Rinpoche’s compassionate (maitrī and karuṇā) teaching, observation, and waiting again and again, a disciple like me—idle, playful, and lacking deep faith in karma—would absolutely never have truly realized the preciousness of taking refuge. I am grateful to Rinpoche for not abandoning the disciple and for allowing me to finally have the opportunity to take refuge in His Eminence Vajra Guru Rinchen Dorjee Rinpoche, and to begin learning to truly face my own heart, correcting my body, speech, and mind.
 
Next, I would like to repent for the evil karma I have committed in the past. I repent for my past attachment to eating meat, especially my fondness for chicken legs. Because of my own craving for food, I harmed countless sentient beings. I repent for loving to tell lies, often talking back to my parents, being irreverent to them, and for failing to be filial. I repent that I stole money from my parents when I was young and regarded it as my own pocket money. I repent for cheating on exams, playing pranks on classmates, skipping classes, and forging teachers’ signatures during my student years. I repent that I frequently viewed matters from my own perspective, thinking that as long as I was fine, it would be fine, yet ignoring others’ feelings.

Rinpoche once expounded to me during one of my audiences that, although I appeared to be obedient on the surface, in fact, I had committed many small evils from childhood to adulthood. If these evil things were to be examined one by one, they would have already become countless. Looking back now, I realize that, exactly as Rinpoche had said, if those small evils I had committed in the past were all laid out, they would indeed be too numerous to record. I repent that I didn’t deeply believe in karma in the past, committing so many wrongdoings, yet I still kept regarding myself as a good person. I am grateful to Rinpoche for compassionately (maitrī and karuṇā) pointing out my problems again and again, giving me the opportunity to turn back and examine myself; only then did I realize how much evil karma I had created through my body, speech, and mind.
 
I am grateful to Rinpoche for compassionately (maitrī and karuṇā) attracting (Puja Teachings Index 22) the disciple. I vow to properly cherish the incomparably wondrous fate of being able to follow His Eminence Vajra Guru Rinchen Dorjee Rinpoche to learn Buddhism, to strive to correct myself, and to practice according to the teachings until being liberated from reincarnation. 
 
Lastly, I pray for His Eminence Vajra Guru Rinchen Dorjee Rinpoche’s good health, longevity, and auspiciousness; his Dharma wheel turns unceasingly; his Buddha Dharma activities flourish; Rinchen Dorjee Rinpoche’s Dharma lineage spreads eternally; the Glorious Jewel Buddhist Monastery of Rinchen Dorjee Rinpoche be smoothly and perfectly completed, benefiting all vast and boundless sentient beings. I thank all Dharma brothers and fellow believers for listening patiently. 

                                                             Reverently written by disciple Guo Ting Wei, Group Three, 

 on June 28, 2026

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Updated on July 1, 2026