1326：Appreciation to the Guru for Compassionate (Maitrī and Karuṇā) Attraction (Puja Teachings Index 22) and Bestowing the Wisdom Life of Learning Buddhism

Prostrations to His Eminence Vajra Guru Rinchen Dorjee Rinpoche, His Holiness the Drikung Kyabgon Chetsang, the Lineage gurus, Dharma Protector Achi Grandmother, and the Buddhas and Bodhisattvas. Greetings, fellow believers and Dharma brothers. I am Wang Feng Feng from Group Four, my Dharma name is Hui Lin Drolma, and I retook refuge in His Eminence Vajra Guru Rinchen Dorjee Rinpoche on 21 June, 2025. I am that disciple who, after retaking refuge, went to Korea for fun and did not, together with the other newly taken-refuge Dharma brothers, implore Rinpoche for the Dharma portrait of Dharma Protector Achi. I am grateful to the guru for compassionately (maitrī and karuṇā) bestowing me the opportunity to publicly praise the guru’s merits, share with you the experience I implored for the Dharma portrait of Dharma Protector Achi and got granted, and to repent the evil karma I have committed.
 
My first refuge was in 2012, when I was in junior high school. At that time, because my grandfather had colorectal cancer, through the introduction of my grandaunt, Dharma brother Wang from Group Two, my mother and I were able to seek an audience with Rinpoche. At that time, I was being bullied at school and felt that everything my classmates said was directed at me. My days were exceedingly painful, and I often quarreled with my mother, even shouting about not going to school. When I sought an audience with Rinpoche for the first time, Rinpoche compassionately (maitrī and karuṇā) asked me, ‘What is it?’ I replied, ‘What my classmates say is very harsh.’ Rinpoche expounded, ‘Then you should not watch television either.’ Being dull-witted, I did not immediately understand, but after returning home, I repeatedly reflected on Rinpoche’s expounding; when my classmates excluded me and targeted me, I kept thinking of Rinpoche’s expounding. Over time, I found that I no longer minded what my classmates said so much. Rinpoche’s expounding encouraged me, who suffered greatly during my junior school years, gave me strength, and gradually enabled me to find ways to get along with my classmates.
 
Thereafter, my mother and I were fortunate to take refuge in His Eminence Vajra Guru Rinchen Dorjee Rinpoche. During the five years after taking refuge, my days were peaceful and stable, and I also received the guru’s guidance in my studies. Rinpoche once compassionately (maitrī and karuṇā) expounded to me, ‘Your ability in the Chinese course is good, and you can use it to raise your scores; you should remember the dates in History; when you return home, first put your things in order, and do not go watch television after throwing your schoolbag aside.’ The guru’s earnest and patient teachings not only helped me, who was being bullied at that time, but also gave my heart something to rely on. However, I was ungrateful. Five years later, because I was admitted to university and became greedy for fun at heart, I left the Buddhist Center. It was not until February of last year, 2025, that I sought an audience with the guru again because of my grandmother’s passing.

My grandmother passed away on February 4, 2025. In October 2024, she was diagnosed with terminal pancreatic cancer. At that time, my family and I were all extremely shocked; she had been well a few months earlier, and how could it suddenly become like this? However, life is impermanent. On the morning of February 4, my mother urgently informed me that my grandmother was in critical condition and told me to hurriedly prepare to go to Taipei. At that moment, my heart sank to the bottom, and I felt as if my whole body were about to shatter, extremely panicked and afraid. Foolish as I was, I did not dare to believe, nor was I willing to believe, that my grandmother, who loved me so dearly, was about to leave.
 
When we rushed from Changhua to the hospital, my grandmother was already at the point of death. Seeing my grandmother suffering, I was terrified, deeply knowing that no one present could help her. I immediately thought of His Eminence Vajra Guru Rinchen Dorjee Rinpoche, and unceasingly recited Rinpoche’s Dharma name in my heart, imploring Rinpoche for blessing my grandmother so that she would not fall into the Three Evil Realms. After my grandmother stopped breathing, my family members and I chanted the Great Six-Syllable Mantra for eight hours for my grandmother in the morgue. During that time, I continuously visualized Rinpoche blessing the family members, and also kept reciting Rinpoche’s Dharma name in my heart. At that time, all the family members present felt that the morgue was very warm, so warm that we needed to take off our coats. However, once we left that room, the temperature of the corridor outside revealed an obvious contrast to that of the morgue, extremely cold and gloomy.

Eight hours later, my grandmother’s appearance manifested an auspicious sign, as if she were asleep. These various signs made me believe that Rinpoche had compassionately (maitrī and karuṇā) blessed my grandmother! I deeply knew that it was Rinpoche who had helped my grandmother and us, allowing our anxious and unsettled hearts to become calm. Under Rinpoche’s blessings, other relatives and I did not feel excessive sorrow over my grandmother’s passing, and there was more of remembrance. I am immensely grateful to Rinpoche!

I felt deeply ashamed because it was only due to my grandmother’s passing that my thought of seeking an audience with the guru arose. I gathered the courage to call the Glorious Jewel to sign up. At that time, I only knew in my heart that I must seek an audience with the guru; otherwise, I would surely regret it for the rest of my life. The Dharma brother on the phone asked me, ‘Why do you want to seek an audience?’ I reported the experience about my grandmother and said that I wanted to implore for repenting. The Dharma brother then asked me, ‘Repent, and then what?’ I was momentarily stunned, and then the words slipped out, ‘To implore for taking refuge.’ I am grateful to the Dharma brother for encouraging me, letting me seriously face my own heart, and clarifying what is truly important.
 
When I sought an audience with Rinpoche on February 8, I felt extremely ashamed, feeling I had no face to meet the guru. After nine years, upon seeing Rinpoche again, my mind went completely blank, and I exceedingly marveled in my heart that the guru’s appearance was no different from what I remembered. When I knelt before Rinpoche, Rinpoche compassionately (maitrī and karuṇā) asked me, ‘What is it?’ I stammered as I reported my grandmother’s passing and that I wanted to implore for repenting. Rinpoche expounded, ‘You have come back only because the guru, the Buddhas, and Bodhisattvas have value to be used now; such a person looks down on sentient beings.’ At that moment, I cried uncontrollably, feeling extremely ashamed. Rinpoche compassionately (maitrī and karuṇā) instructed me to kneel at the side. I am grateful for the guru’s compassionate (maitrī and karuṇā) mercy, allowing me, who was foolish and selfish, to reflect on my faults at the side and to listen to the guru’s expounding.
 
While kneeling, my tears and mucus kept flowing, and my body felt extremely hot. I am deeply grateful to the guru who, despite my foolishness and ingratitude, still blessed me and compassionately (maitrī and karuṇā) bestowed me help. Rinpoche asked, ‘While kneeling at the side, what did you think of?’ I replied, ‘I repent to Rinpoche that I always put myself first, wanting others to follow me; even when my grandmother was ill, I thought only of myself, only feeling I had no face to meet Rinpoche and not daring to seek an audience; however, I didn’t think of my grandmother’s suffering, and kept delaying until my grandmother passed away, I sought an audience. Moreover, I was ungrateful; when I was young, my parents had no time to care for me, and it was Rinpoche who taught me, yet I was actually so ungrateful.’ I am grateful to the guru for giving me the opportunity to reflect, allowing me to deeply realize that I was gravely mistaken, and even to be startled at how I had come to live like this! I resolved to follow the guru to learn Buddhism. Rinpoche compassionately (maitrī and karuṇā) expounded, instructing me to read Happiness and Suffering twenty times when going back, and then come again to seek an audience.
 
On March 29, 2025, I sought an audience with Rinpoche, imploring for taking refuge and attend the pujas at the Glorious Jewel Buddhist Monastery of Rinchen Dorjee Rinpoche. Rinpoche asked about my reflections after reading Happiness and Suffering. I repented to Rinpoche, ‘I left at that time because I put myself first and forgot the guru’s benevolence. Now, I feel it is already too late, and therefore earnestly hope that I can take refuge again.’ I am grateful for the guru’s compassion (maitrī and karuṇā) that Rinpoche instructed me to speak with the board members. I am thankful to the Dharma brothers of the board for helping me once again strengthen my resolve to follow the guru to learn Buddhism during the talk. After talking with the board members, I sought an audience with Rinpoche on June 14, 2025, imploring for taking refuge and attend the pujas; I am grateful to the guru for compassionately (maitrī and karuṇā) granting my imploration. I retook refuge on June 21, 2025.

Yet, after retaking refuge, I still did not change my bad ways, and did not regard learning Buddhism as the most important thing. On August 2, when the newly taken-refuge Dharma brothers together implored for a Dharma portrait of Dharma Protector Achi, I did not register because I went to Korea for fun. I am grateful to the guru for publicly blessing me on the Dharma throne, expounding that I had already retaken refuge, but I wasn’t diligent, first went to have fun, and thought that Rinpoche had not found me; I had money to have fun but no money to make offerings, and the offering I made on the day of taking refuge was only $1,000 NTD.
 
I repent that my mindset in learning Buddhism has been deeply flawed and extremely foolish; I have not yearned for the Dharma, nor been proactive, but always passive; having finally and uneasily been able to retake refuge, but I did not cherish it well, feeling ashamed toward the guru; I could only speak fine words, yet what I did was completely not so. I repent that my mindset toward making offerings was incorrect; I made offerings with a calculating mind and always kept money first for my own use, deducting here and there, and only made the offerings with the remainder.

The following Monday, I called the Glorious Jewel to sign up to seek an audience with Rinpoche on Saturday, imploring for repentance. That week, I felt extremely uneasy, deeply remorseful about my own deeds, clearly understanding that I had not been diligent, had not closely followed the guru to learn Buddhism, and that everything was my own problem. On Saturday, as I knelt before the guru, I repented to the guru. Rinpoche asked, ‘How old are you?’ I answered, ‘I am 28 years old.’ Rinpoche expounded, ‘You are still young, and go have fun first; Mid-Autumn Festival and Christmas are coming; what will you do if friends invite you?’ I replied, ‘I won’t go play anymore; it is not enjoyable.’ Rinpoche expounded, ‘It is not a marriage matchmaking agency here…’ I answered, ‘I do not need a boyfriend.’ Rinpoche smiled and said, ‘I never believed such words.’ Then Rinpoche compassionately (maitrī and karuṇā) accepted the offering. At that moment, my tears could not stop at all, and I was deeply grateful in my heart to the guru for his compassionate (maitrī and karuṇā) mercy, compassionately (maitrī and karuṇā) accepting the offering.
 
I deeply feel that Rinpoche is truly extremely compassionate (maitrī and karuṇā); in this lifetime, by what merits and abilities could I encounter such a good guru, who is willing to teach me, a person of such inferior root capacity. I repent that, because of my greediness for play, I have always caused my family worries a lot, and have always been obstinate and self-willed, unwilling to heed advice. Yet it was very remarkable that, after seeking an audience with Rinpoche that day, my always restless mind suddenly settled down. In recent days, my mother has also noticed my change, and she said, ‘I am grateful for Rinpoche’s teachings.’ I am grateful to the guru for attracting (Puja Teachings Index 22) me and letting me calm my mind to learn Buddhism diligently.

I then sought an audience on Saturday, August 23, imploring Rinpoche to transmit the liturgy of Dharma Protector Achi and bestow me the Dharma portrait. I felt very uneasy and did not dare to raise my head from beginning to end. I am grateful to Rinpoche for compassionately (maitrī and karuṇā) bestowing me the Dharma portrait of Dharma Protector Achi. The following week, on Saturday, September 6, when I sought an audience, I implored Rinpoche to transmit the liturgy of Dharma Protector Achi. Rinpoche compassionately (maitrī and karuṇā) asked, ‘What do you implore the liturgy of Dharma Protector for?’ I answered, ‘To learn Buddhism diligently and to be liberated from birth and death.’ I am grateful to the guru for granting my imploration, instructing that after completing the Dharma Protector practice at the Sunday puja the next day, I could receive the Dharma text of Dharma Protector Achi. I am deeply grateful to the guru for compassionately (maitrī and karuṇā) teaching me and for not giving up on me. I must follow the guru properly to learn Buddhism.
I repent for the evil karma I have committed. I repent that, after retaking refuge, I did not change my bad ways, and my mind always craved play, not regarding learning Buddhism as the most important thing, and not yearning for the Dharma. I repent that I used a mindset of seeking protection in learning Buddhism, and was irreverent toward the Three Jewels. I repent that my attitude toward making offerings was incorrect; I always kept money first for my own use and only offered what remained. I am grateful to Rinpoche for directly pointing out my problems, allowing me to have the opportunity to correct my faults. I repent that I was unfilial toward my parents, often talking back to them, becoming unhappy over just a few words they said to me, raising my voice at them, and I repent for causing them worry and affliction. I repent that I used to love eating fish, especially fish roe and whitebait, most enjoying piling whitebait onto rice and eating it in large mouthfuls; I repent for harming countless sentient beings because of my craving for food. I repent that, because I loved to eat, my parents would buy these for me in order to satisfy me, through which I caused my parents to commit the karma of killing.
 
I repent that I put myself first in all matters. When my grandmother was ill and asked me to help care for her, I avoided it because I did not want to face her illness, using work as an excuse to refuse her; I repent for being so unfilial. I repent that I read pirated comics and novels in childhood, violating the precept against stealing. I repent my arrogance and pride, looking down on others and being self-righteous, because of my pride, those who got along with me felt uncomfortable and disrespected. I repent for speaking of others’ right and wrong behind their backs; even if I did not say it, I still scolded others in my mind. I repent that I loved to lie, claiming to have done things I had not done, only to make others think I was awesome and to gain their praise. The mistakes I made are too numerous to record. I have resolved to diligently correct myself, to strive to rely on the guru in learning Buddhism, and to be liberated from birth and death. Dharma brothers, please take me as a warning.
 
Lastly, I pray for His Eminence Vajra Guru Rinchen Dorjee Rinpoche’s good health, longevity, and auspiciousness; the Dharma wheel turns unceasingly; his Buddha Dharma activities flourish; Rinchen Dorjee Rinpoche’s Dharma lineage spreads eternally; Buddha Dharma is broadly transmitted at the Glorious Jewel Buddhist Monastery of Rinchen Dorjee Rinpoche, benefiting all sentient beings. I thank all Dharma brothers and fellow believers for listening patiently. 

 

                                    Reverently written by disciple Wang Feng Feng, Group Four, 

 on April 19, 2026

« Previous - Traces of Liberating Beings - Next »

Updated on April 23, 2026